Showing posts with label Dear Diary. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dear Diary. Show all posts
Monday, February 13, 2012
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Oh Diary my diary
Matt: Hello Diary, its been a long time my friend how have you been?
Diary: oh my god Matt where have you been?? I have so much to tell you, well fir..
Matt: Okay that was a rhetorical and how actually am I conversing with you you have no lips or even a mind to speak from. What is making this possible?
Diary: Seriously? after all these years only now you're asking this?
Matt: Um yeah..so?
Diary: well Matt what I can say is that; Diary is Matt and Matt is Diary...
Matt: What the fuck is that suppose to mean?
Diary: That Your mind is the equivalent of a Boeing 747-8 in a car wash.
Matt: again... What the hell is that suppose to mean?
Diary: You are like a pair of sneakers being worn by a deck chair.
Matt: okay you're getting weird...
Diary: Say's the guy who's literally typing to himself.
Matt: Wait a minute, are you saying this is all in my head?
Dairy:...and Bingo was his name.
Bingo: Finally you acknowledge me!
Matt: ----------------------
Aroused - Tom Vek's SUB-EDIT by Tom Vek
Billy Ocean - Caribbean Queen (Tesla Boy edit) by Tesla Boy
Final DJs- Moonlight Serenade by FINAL DJs
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Why didn't you call me??
Dear Diary
Why don’t you ever reply to me? I have a feeling this is a one-sided relationship, do you get a kick out of my misery and pain? I can just see it now, you reading out my woes to your friends while smoking joints and watching porn. Does it make you happy knowing that I’m not going through life all breezy, care free and full of sparkle. You know what you can go and screw yourself really. I might as well pay a hooker coz A: I wouldn’t waste time forming complete sentences with structure and accurate spelling and B: I get something out of it.
So “Diary” go do whatever it is you do, which is lay in someone’s underwear draw being used only for the sole purpose of other people puking their lives into your insides. While you lay there taking it like the bitch you are. Ha ha ha.
Phew that makes me feel a lot better. Thanx for the vent
Matthew.
Dear Matthew
F%^&* YOU!!!
Diary.
Why don’t you ever reply to me? I have a feeling this is a one-sided relationship, do you get a kick out of my misery and pain? I can just see it now, you reading out my woes to your friends while smoking joints and watching porn. Does it make you happy knowing that I’m not going through life all breezy, care free and full of sparkle. You know what you can go and screw yourself really. I might as well pay a hooker coz A: I wouldn’t waste time forming complete sentences with structure and accurate spelling and B: I get something out of it.
So “Diary” go do whatever it is you do, which is lay in someone’s underwear draw being used only for the sole purpose of other people puking their lives into your insides. While you lay there taking it like the bitch you are. Ha ha ha.
Phew that makes me feel a lot better. Thanx for the vent
Matthew.
Dear Matthew
F%^&* YOU!!!
Diary.
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